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josh washington just wants to have a good time (
2015-10-24 04:00 am (UTC)
and that's the eternal conundrum, isn't it: push people away, or keep them close? accept their help? the thought that chris might leave him has absolutely crossed josh's mind once or twice or a hundred times over the course of their friendship; it's always a storm of conflicting emotions whenever he thinks about it, which is why he tries not to. josh can be selfish, he knows that, his self-medication is proof of it, but in this—he has to be charitable. he's convinced himself that seeing chris with a good life is the best thing for the both of them. you know, in the end, he's doing chris a favor. chris has it in him. he just doesn't know it yet.
it won't mean ashley is suddenly gonna... replace him, or whatever. right? josh is—he's still gonna be chris' best friend. it's not like chris has to...
choose, or anything.
josh raises his drink, his stomach giving an uncomfortable, sickly roll. maybe vodka on top of bourbon wasn't such a great idea. he would lean forward to clink the glass against chris', but he can't bring himself to move; he only sinks deeper into the cushions and extends his arm in a vague, upward motion, trusting the heat of their tangled legs convey the last couple of inches for him, the sentiment he hasn't managed to express with words. his grin, however, remains steady.
Yeah, man. To you and me. Shitheads for—for life.
toast complete, he knocks back a solid gulp of the vodka-soju, squeezing his eyes shut at the burn. yeah. for life.
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